Exit the Dragon

Now I figured after I posted my "At the Movies" post, that I had basically seen all the best and worst movies 2007 had to offer, but I guess I spoke too soon, because I forgot a little film called "Dragon Wars" AKA "D-War." Now of course I was aware that this was going to be terrible before I saw it, but you can just never quite pinpoint exactly how bad films like this will be. First off my dad had just rented this out of boredom. He felt it would be some dumb but fun entertainment and therefore I decided it might be worth a laugh and joined him as well, but man what a painful 90 minutes. Now I'm not going to go into too much detail but wow "D-War" is bad, I mean really bad, even bad enough for me to edit my 07' list (It isn't number one but it's up there.) Here's an explanation as to why I hated it as much as I did.

Starting off, one of the most annoying elements to "D-War" was it's script. With dialogue reminiscent of a 50's B-Movie and incredibly weak melodrama you'd wonder if the director is mentally disabled. Characters constantly change motivation, say obvious things out loud, are incredibly hollow and unrealistic and of course always take action before thinking. Let's as well not forget the incredibly long, boring and completely unimaginative back-story about ancient Korea, magical spirits and other ridiculous fantasy mumbo jumbo. (And how could you forget the plot holes as well) The acting was pretty weak and bland. (With the best performance coming from that guy who plays Daryl on "The Office") Robert Forster seems to be out of place as a reincarnated martial arts guru and wow it's really painful. Fortunately out of all of this, "D-War" is definitely a film that is so bad it's almost entertaining. Sometimes I found myself laughing out loud but other times I was bored out of my mind, It's not for the faint of heart.

So thanks a lot "D-War" thanks for showing us what can be considered as entertainment in our culture. Now hopefully they'll have learned their lesson... It's just so very, very sad. At least I can always rely on watching "Beyond Loch Ness" to ease the pain.

Line from Beyond Loch Ness
Tough Scientist Dude: It looks like an unknown species.
Young Guy: What kind of unknown species?